It’s the age-old question for every sleep deprived parent: what is the best way to get your baby settled and off to sleep?
From controlled crying, co-sleeping, self-settling to “no crying” sleep strategies, there is a plethora of sleep methodologies, advice and professional help on offer. For parents, it can be overwhelming to work out what fits their family best.
As it is Infant Mental Health Awareness Week (11-15 June), it is a timely reminder of the importance of taking an infant mental health approach to any sleep or settling techniques.
The first three years of a child’s life are a period of incredible growth and development. The earliest relationships with their parents and caregivers not only form the foundations for the child’s on-going development, but can also impact their health and wellbeing.
Relationships let babies express themselves. For example, a cry, a laugh or question is responded to with a cuddle, a smile or an answer. By communicating back and forth we are creating and sharing experiences together, strengthening the bond and helping the baby learn more about the world at the same time.
Science has shown us that babies seek closeness and comfort from their parents. They also cry as a way of communicating with us. A little grizzle might not require intervention but if it escalates to a cry, the message is very clear – the baby needs help.
Tuning in and responding to a child with warmth and gentleness, lays the foundations for a child’s healthy development and helps to shape the adult they will become. It also lays the foundation for a restful sleep. A calm and content child, who understands there is emotional support available to them from their caregivers, should they need it, is more likely to experience better quality sleep than a child who is left to cry and “manage on their own.
Parents should be wary of "one-size-fits all” sleep strategies - no two babies are the same, they all have different personalities and temperaments. By understanding the baby’s needs, cues and capabilities you can create an emotional and physical safe sleep space.
Our advice is for parents to choose an approach that that focuses on the infant and family’s mental health and wellbeing – where parents are encouraged to comfort their babies to reach sustainable change in a gentle and loving way.
Cindy Davenport is a child and family health nurse, midwife and lactation consultant, and has worked in the early parenting field since 1998. She is the Co-Director of Safe Sleep Space is an early parenting consultancy specialising in sleep and settling of infants and toddlers. The organisation promotes a gentle and nurturing approach sleep and settling, with an emphasis on caregiver interaction, the child’s social-emotional and an understanding that every infant toddler and parent is unique.
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Sadly, each year, SIDS and fatal sleeping accidents claim the lives of many infants as a result of unsafe sleeping environments.
It is essential that parents ensure their young infants and toddlers sleep safely at all times and that the research-based guidelines are followed. Download our safe sleeping recommendations.
At the risk of stating the painfully obvious, caring for multiples is a lot more work than for single babies. Take all the caregiving issues and multiply by 2, 3 or however many babies there are. It makes sense then to learn all you can about ways to encourage the littlest ones to sleep well.
There are some common themes when it comes to managing our children’s sleep. And although every baby and toddler is an individual, parents tend to share similar responses to sleeping problems. One is hoping that things will get better with time, the other is finding it difficult to ask for help.